Confession
When I wanted to go on an adventure with God to China, so that we could do that cool thing where I unravel and he shows up and I meet God in a new and fresh way and I feel alive again, I really thought the underlying pretext of the plan was that I would stay in China for a year. God totally psyched me out and flipped the script by giving me adventure in spades by causing all my dreams to fall apart and for me to now be sleeping in my friends' kids bedroom, while I figure out what the next step is. From this vantage point adventure is for the birds and I want my old comfy predictable existence back. Funny how adventure and trusting God was perfectly ok with me, if it came on my terms aka China, but doing the "trusting God on an adventure" in America suddenly makes me want to call the whole thing off. Almost makes me wonder if perhaps, I was not really interested in the trusting God part of the adventure, just the international Traveller portion. So basically...