Weeping endures

I find myself wading through the deepest trenches of sadness these days. I listen to Shane and Shane's "My Jesus I love thee" and weep. In it they sing, "Let the Amen, sound from your people again." Not sure why that phrase grips me like it does. But it is like a groan deep in my belly.  I don't even know if I truly understand my own emotions.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Irony and fortunate

I left a job that was deeply fulfilling in many ways but ultimately had no growth opportunities for me，as far as I could tell. Had I simply gone from 28-40 hours，I would be making the same amount of money that I am making in China. The rest is nearly a wash, but because the cost of living is less here，I come out ahead by a few months on how fast I can get out of debt if I stick to the plan.  And yet，I am in the process of becoming. I am like my  previous place of employment going through a renovation process. It is rife with difficulties. But the hope that lies on the other side is what we yearn for.  Life in China at this stage is simply about the basics：eating enough or the right foods to fuel my body，sleeping enough or at the appropriate hours，and showing up and doing a good job at work，being diligent to watch spending，spending time with the Lord，finding some friends. With Each piece  of this becoming more like a natural rhythm，life her get...
Read more

Living the Dream

As anthropologists, our dream is to dive head first into another culture so that we can experience the other.   It is this dream that pushes us through school and informs our choices along the way. We save sacrifice certain pleasures in one life so that we can have money for traveling to live another life. We research packing lightly and traveling efficiently. We know how to sleep on planes and trains, so that we can make the most of the daylight offered to us in our desired locations. We know basic phrases in many languages, and have an ear to pick up the new ones to add to our tool belt. For many of us, much of life is spent in a constant state of wanderlust, always dreaming of the next opportunity to experience something new. We crave paradigm shifts like most people crave potato chips. We love the revelatory journey of interacting with people who have experienced life differently. Whether we are studying linguistics, gender roles, religious practices, or ...
Read more

Feelings, misty water colored feelings

Image
I have lived most of my life understanding that there are circumstances in life that create feelings that are often contrary to the word of God. For instance, I'm sure you like me have felt hopeless at one point or another. Well, Romans 15:13 says that we serve, "the God of all hope."  So reality is that there is no circumstance on earth that is truly hopeless. We just have to ask the God of all hope to fill us with hope for our current circumstance. The same is true with other emotions: fear, loneliness, etc. "God has not given us a spirit of fear." "God places the lonely in families." (You can look up the references easier than I can, you gave google.) Perhaps that is why I don't know what to write. I am in a constant state of having feelings that I know are not true, according to the Kingdom of God. So every moment I am warring in my spirit to choose to believe the truth. I am living a sort of Maslov's pyramid of necessities. We cannot...
Read more